john my beloved

so can we pretend sweetly
before the mystery ends?

so can we be friends, sweetly
before the mystery ends?

so can we contend, peacefully
before my history ends?

- sufjan stevens, john my beloved

This order feels right. And whether age or resignation has led him there the endpoint seems honest too. To struggle peacefully - with someone else or ourselves - more than being something they aren't alone or together.

i've seen it happen

jeff tweedy, in a guardian interview, said that when his sons turn him onto new music he can show them the sound's influence. which makes sense, though i was surprised he called it the better version. i haven’t thought of him as an older artist until that statement, despite the knock that wilco is “dad rock”, whatever the fuck people think that means. jeff also said that between he and his sons not much slips between the cracks with new music listening. which reminded me that years ago he spoke to letting go of the urge to feel he had to obsessively listen to every b side. i'm not hating. i'm sure if i were talented enough to have people document what i thought about things, there'd be some evolutions. and contradictions. but it bothered me because i talk to college students a lot. i ask them about their taste in music. i don’t feel like i have to listen to everything (this means you, the xx) but i also know sometimes they have the “better” version. whatever the fuck that means. anyway, here’s an example: this is as good as anything we had around in the 90s (and is at least three times better than the decemberists).